Prayer Warriors

I just have some Prayer request.
Connor Deal a 6th grader at Bonham Middle school really needs prayers. please go to this link.
http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/connordeal
He is in the car pool after school with my son Jash. very touching story.

Rick Owens is also in need of prayers here is the Link to his site:
http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/rickpatrickowens
His parents are in the Jeep exclusive Club with myself.

Here is a blog I have been following a few of my friends are friends with this family, This proves prayers are working.
http://brysonquinto.blogspot.com/


Just wanted to get my Prayer Warriors rolling on those prayers,

There is power in prayer.
John 15:7
If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.

God Bless you.

Please contuine to pray for my family my children and I have been missing John more and more these days. Not sure when the hurt starts to heal, but pray for us..

Week four during Grief Share

This week for Grief Share class we focused on losing a spouse. I didn't just lose my Husband I also lost our hopes and dreams. The dream of having someone to grow old with. Watching this weeks video just made me more sad. This is why I'm not so sure these classes are helping.
We talked about the loneliness that it brings and how friends leave you behind.
I have been confronted by losing friends, John's friends. Friends who I thought would always be here. Not to just help when things are broke but friends to lean on and take my son hunting.
We talked about how men don't know how to act when a friend passes.
It was brought up maybe it's hard on them being around me and the kids because before it was always John, myself and the kids. . You can really learn a lot about people after someone dies.
I prayed last night for those friends.
I'm even thinking about writing a letter to one. John really cherished their friendship, and I just want David to know if he is also grieving it's ok. We all miss John, and to let David know I pray for him.
We talked about finding a new identity, They said I have to accept the fact I'm now single. I'm not a wife. I'm just me. Well it sucks!!
Even writing that makes me sick. It's so overwhelming.
We talked about how different it is for a man than it is for a women. One lady said.. Men replace,, women pace... I can believe that..
I have had a lot of anxiety.. there are so many things I have to learn how to do. fixing tail lights, plumbing problems, homework with the kids, It seems right now my world as fallen. I have so many broken things and really have no idea how to fix them. here is just a short list of broken items.. dishwasher (since before Christmas) lawn mower, sprinkler system, tail light, Jeep as problem starting. the list could really go on. Urg!!!!
So tonight I will pray... "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you" 1 peter 5:7
: But I trust in you,O Lord I say' you are my God, My times are in your hands. Psalm 31:14-15

I do have an awesome God.. I have been blessed with two wonderful Children, a great family, and friends. to which I am very grateful for.
Tonight I'm going to dinner with friends to celebrate one of my best friends birthday's April. I'm a lucky girl to have such wonderful friends.
Because this being the week of losing a spouse I'm posting a picture from our wedding July 8th 1994

Peaceful,

My baby is 14.. ( wow) We had a party Friday night at Church. It turned out great. I'm so lucky to have such wonderful kids. Jash is saving his money for a new cell phone. I bought his first one two years ago and now it's his turn.
I think he made more than enough to buy one. After his party I went to celebrate LaWana's birthday with her we had a girls night out and had lots of fun. I may be feeling to old to have so much fun though, the next morning wasn't so much fun.
I also made it through my friend Jennifer's Wedding Saturday. She was so beautiful I'm so glad I went. I started crying when her mother started walking down the aisle. I just love weddings it's a beginning of something wonderful I pray God will bless them with many happy years together..
I just want to say to my friends thank you.. I may not say it enough you all mean so much to me. Between my family and my friends I have felt blessed.. some friends are more like sister's. and I have a few male friends I consider best friends. So Thank you all.
Today the kids and I are at home relaxing and enjoying a nice Sunday. Peaceful Sunday!! Hope everyone as a great week. please continue to pray for those that need it.

3rd class of Grief Share

I just went to my 3rd grief share class. The class it self went much easier than the last two. You talk about the person you loss and share with the group what ever you feel like sharing. Talking about John is hard but I enjoy talking about him. John was always my best friend in my life and I miss him but I want to be able to talk about him in front of other and it not seem weird.
Next week we are talking about losing a spouse.. That class may be the hardest yet to come.
You know it may be easy for other's to judge me and to think my life is too much Drama. But It's my drama I didn't ask for it, It just happened. People may put them self's into my Drama if it should be called that but till you have been where I'm at you have no idea what someone is going through.
I'm trying to learn how to live my life without what I thought was the main part.
It's like biscuits and gravy my favorite breakfast I no longer have my gravy so I have to learn how to eat my biscuits with something different like Jelly or just butter.
Ok that might not sound hard to some but for me it's very difficult. I guess I just called John my gravy. Now I can see him shacking his head calling me a dork.
That's why I loved him...
all in all this past week went by pretty easy. The only big stress I have is my taxes... Oh How I hate this time of year. John always said I let things get to me that I shouldn't. John being the smartest man I have known I guess he was right.
I will be glad to have Thursday over though that's when I meet with my tax lady.
On a brighter note Jash's 14th birthday is Saturday the 7th. We are having his birthday Friday night at Church I just hope he as a wonderful day. On his Birthday we have a wedding to attend, PLEASE pray I can do this. I'm so scared.. It will be my first wedding. I have thought a lot about my wedding but what makes me sadder is Kenzies... Just pray for us..
also here is a list to pray for..
Rick Owens who is battling cancer
Shelia who is also battling cancer
Mikka Lamberson my dear friend who has the same Leukemia as John.
Larry Mclain who lost his mother today
My friend Jennifer who is getting married Saturday pray for a happy marriage
Just pray for everyone, and make sure to say Thanks for what you do have.
I pray for everyone in my grief Share classes everyone there as their own hurt and I pray God will heal their pain.
I'm thankful for two wonderful children,and family and great friends who have stayed beside me through the hardest time and didn't bail because it was too hard on them. Mostly I thank God for giving me the time I had with John. The memories I will hold dear to my heart.